Spiritual Addictions
52I toe the line between addiction and addiction, attempting to balance on the fine line of freedom. On the one hand is normal, an appealing place of safety and security. On the other hand is social rebellion, an appealing place of individuality and a place to [attempt to] find personal worth and value. And right in the middle is the radical living of freedom in Jesus that is neither status quo nor rebellion for rebellion's sake - nor even compromise between the two - but something different altogether.
It seems that there is some part of me - and most people, I've noticed - that wants to find the easiest possible out in most situations. Why do I not want to live in God-freedom just because addiction-slavery is easier? Why do I not do the very thing I want to do? What is it in me that causes such civil war inside of me? Why can't I just do and be what I want to do and be? If I am wholly Jesus's, if I am wholly redeemed, if I am a new creation in Christ Jesus, why don't I live my new identity?
So far Christianity has not done a very good job of explaining this to me. Sometimes Christianity makes me feel like it's my fault, causing me to feel guilt over my failure and pressure to do something to change. Sometimes Christianity makes me feel like it's just the way things are and it's just the way things will continue to be, causing me to feel hopelessness and despair. Rarely does Christianity provide an answer to this question that causes neither guilt nor despair but clarity and understanding, and maybe even hope for something better. I would think a Jesus solution to this would bring not despair, but hope; not guilt, but forgiveness and love. So maybe there's still another answer out there that I have, for some reason, not found, an answer that rings true with who Jesus is and what Jesus is all about.
In the meantime I still struggle with my addictions, my spiritual addictions with finding a place that I can feel like I belong other than the one place I belong: with Jesus. I guess I just forget sometimes that living freedom, while it takes far more intentionality than slavery, is worth infinitely more than bondage; and life under Christ, while it takes far more sacrifice than living under the rule of another, is far more freeing, satisfying, and fulfilling than living under the rule of men, money, or myself. I just need another spiritual wake-up call.
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I think you are asking yourself some good questions. Keep asking and you will find what you are looking for.
I think I know what you’re looking for; it’s a world without sin. I too long of it! Sometimes so much that it hurts. I look forward to the day I leave this world to be in my real home. As you know already I’m sure that as evil reigns, the only reason we are here is to reach out to people who are lost, and without us will not get to go home.
Thanks, dottie, for your encouragement. I don't think I will ever stop looking, thinking, and asking questions.
Tyhill, while I agree with you that the world will never be without sin, I think that as people who are supposed to be Jesus in this world we should not only be trying to help bring people to relationship with Jesus, but also to be fighting the evil that is alive and well in this world. I personally do not believe in giving up on this world and just living to try to bring as many people with me to heaven. While it is an admirable goal to try to bring people to close relationship with God, there is more to life as a Jesus follower than that. But, yeah, as an idealist it hurts to see so much brokenness in the world, I would definitely agree.
Keep looking at Jesus, we get transformed as we behold him. One day you'll suddenly realize how far you've grown, and you'll see that God has been faithful all along!
Read this somewhere: someone said that every critics of Jesus can't agree. Some say he's too radical, others not radical enough, and so on. Maybe it means he is the only normal one amongst us all... :)
He is what was meant to be and we are what has instead become. Perhaps that makes him normal, perhaps not. Either way, he is the only truly different one.
Patience virtue;
It is great that you are sharing your situation so openly. That shows courage, and that is a key attribute rewarded by God.
Typically, in repsonse to a post like yours, I would give a spiritual answer. Just keep seeking the Bible, and you will be just fine. It seems to me that you are terrific already.
Here is a worldly answer that you may consider. It works for me. I try to stay busy doing what Jesus did, speading the word of God and helping the needy. If I consume my time completely with that, then there is no time for sin. That is just what I do...
I disagree, keeping myself busy generally makes things worse because I get focused on what I can or should be doing for God instead of focusing on the God-relationship. Doing, for me, has to come out of an intense God-relationship.
As for reading the Bible...well, for one thing, it doesn't help when I read it the wrong way (which is how I was taught to read it, like it was the answer key to life rather than a relational book), so it is very hard for me to read it as consistently as many other Christians do (or think we're supposed to). Besides, the whole "read your Bible every day" thing is only 50 or 100 years old (maybe as old as the Industrial Revolution, when individuals could afford to own their own Bibles). That's not a Biblical criteria for God-relationship, I don't think. Not that it's a bad thing to read one's Bible, but it's not the most important thing (talking to God and listening to Him are the most important things).
RainbowRecognizer 3 years ago
You know... you say you need another spiritual wake up call. I'm going to invite you to check out something... what you do with it is up to you. It certainly has the potential to allow you to live in the freedom you are seeking :o) http://www.abraham-hicks.com/lawofattractionsource